why?

Age does not always bring wisdom; sometimes it just brings complacency. I am currently looking after my two grandsons on their home turf--a half-day into 3 days on my own with them. Those who know me can tell how desperate my daughter must be for a break! It is not my daughters wisdom that I am questioning in this blog, however, but that of most adults in general.



When the boys are out at the farm, there is a constant stream of questions. My aunt said, during a recent visit, that when I came out to the farm as a young boy, I was the same way. Today I am in their territory, and the behavior is the same. Questions about everything but mostly "why?" Why is there no 90 on the minute side of the clock? How do they know what colour dinosaurs were? What is the name of my feet? And each answer I give is followed by the same followup question: "why?" I know that many adults find this very tiring (Talk to me in a day or two; I probably will, too!), but so far the constant questioning has only served to stimulate me into asking my own question: "why is he asking why?" The simple answer is, "he wants to know." The reason most answers are followed with a "why" is...well, because I don’t give very good answers!

At what age does this questioning stop? Why does it stop (ok, slow down)? Our tolerance for adults with this behavior tends to be very low. I know because I provide a learning environment for adults for a living. Every year, I run across students who simply will not ask a question any more. They have been made to feel stupid or embarrassed, or they have simply lost the desire to learn anything they don’t have to learn. We have all run into those adults who won’t stop asking questions, too, but it has been my experience that more often than not they ask questions to hear their own voice or get attention--not so much the quest for knowledge.



So why does my 4-year-old grandson have it right? When we quit asking why, we quit seeking the truth, quit seeking new knowledge, and quit questioning that which is accepted, but may be settling for something that is wrong. Ultimately, this can lead to the conditions necessary for a genocide. It is the actions of a child that remind me the importance of asking the question and continuing to ask until the answer we get truly makes sense. My grandson does not have the ego that makes him afraid to ask again when the answer I give does not make sense. He keeps asking. In the classroom, I have to remember that just because I gave an answer does not mean it was a good answer or that it made sense to the asker. My job is to keep coming up with different answers to the same question until the asker truly understands. If all my students behaved like my grandson, we would not cover as much material, but everyone would get an A because they would truly understand.


We all need to act more like the child we once were; we cannot fall into the trap of complacency. Not asking "why" leads to being manipulated by the press, our leaders or even our kids. Not wanting to ask "why" is a symptom of our loss of interest in the workings of the world around us. Being scared to ask "why" is a symptom of our insecurity. As school starts this week, remember to be more childlike, remember the thrill of discovery, remember that its okay not to know but it is not okay not to want to know. This advice is not just for students. I believe this holds true for all. Thanks to my grandson for continuing to ask "why." We all need to be more like that.